fear

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I can remember a few occasions of facing my fears in life. The first ones that come to mind are what I'll call fears of nature.One early fear of nature came to me when I was about 8 years old and I was playing in the woods. I was in a fantasy world, battling some monster or enemy army, when I came to a little creek bed. I was afraid to jump across at first, then I told myself, "It's okay, I'll live until I'm 35!" Which to my young self meant something like "135." I made the jump across, and I was fine. It wasn't really about the age I would live to, but about snapping myself out of a temporary fear that was threatening to ruin my play time.

Last week on our sail-camping adventure I had another moment of facing a natural fear. This time the threat was sailing from Matagorda Island back to Port O'Connor. We sailed out just fine, and a had a great time play sailing while we camped out for two nights. But on the day we were scheduled to sail back (we had to sail back, the island is only accessible by boat) a storm was predicted to blow in with 15-20 knot winds and 3-5 ft waves. On an average day of sailing, I might consider that a fun challenge. But for our trek back, we were carrying all our gear strapped to the sailyak, and we were towing our dear friends in their kayak. Yes, we towed our friends out there. Again, it was no problem on the way out, but in rough waters with high wind, things could get pretty scary. We woke up early to try to beat the higher winds that would be rolling in later.  We watched the sunrise, and hit the water. The first part of the journey was the worst. Sailing along with a white knuckle grip on the sheet and rudder, I worried about how my friends were faring back there as waves washed over the bow. I reefed in the sail because we couldn't handle all that wind-power. I worried about all that could happen. I was afraid. Then, I thought, "Okay, I have on a life jacket."  I turned and yelled back, "We have on life jackets!" I got big grins back, then I relaxed, and sailed on.  It was a little ounce of encouragement that reminded me that we would (probably) be fine. A little ounce of courage scattered the threatening fear. "I'm going to live until I'm 35." Worked for the 8 year old me jumping a ditch. "I'm wearing a life jacket." Worked for me this time. We made it back in record time, and found a great seafood restaurant with something to wash down our meal. We felt alive, invigorated, and rejuvenated.

Occasions to rise above fear are even more common in our everyday lives. They come up in relationships when we risk sharing ourselves with another. They come up when we find courage to speak truth in the face of opposition and oppression. They come up when we decide to go back to school, or make a career move, or have a child. Occasions to rise up above fear are occasions to grow. Often times, we don't know what the outcome will be, and the trick is to find courage anyway.

As Christians, we worship a God who's messengers often say, "Do not be afraid." God teaches us to face fear, face darkness, and not be overcome by it. Jesus walked into death, and was resurrected "trampling down death by death." This gift of life we have received takes courage,  and we grow when we face our fears.

P.S. The picture is from the smooth-sailing trip TO the island. On the way back we didn't have a convenient photo opportunity.

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